Fade to Black

Oh yes one of my favourite topics. On the Gorums I speak quite a great deal about fading the sex scenes from Gor to black. I just dont see the need for EVERY time your character bumps pixels you need to have a 10 hour fuckfest. At the 2 hour mark really, you're not in RP anymore, you're cybering. I've apparantly gotten the scarlet letter on my chest from posting my aversion to this because I've had no less than 3 men tell me that "someone" told them that I wouldnt RP sex with them. Ummmm thats NOT what I said. Or maybe not what I meant. Gor isnt ALWAYS about the sex. But the sex is good as a part of things, just not the only part. We're seeing more "paga sluts" and "coin girls" on Gor these days. Why is that? Oh yah because I forgot that Gor was the SLwide forum to show off your cybering skills you pathetic creature. I'm sorry, some of these girls are my friend, but I know a LOT of girls who use cybersex as some kind of validation for themselves. Ummm NO. I'm NOT going to take my self esteem from how well I can get some dude off with my words. I KNOW I can get a dude off because of my words.

So on that note Vyl and I have been dancing around the sex issue for the past month or so. One month, RP every day and no sex. Ok apparantly I have to work at this and seduce him. Ok I get it, you like women to persue you actively. Ok fine. So finally after being his pot girl for a few weeks, he tells me I have to write a dance. So I do. I write a need dance. And its fucking HOT because well.. I wrote it. Its not masturbating in the grass hot its just "you WILL fuck me now because you're going to want this more than you've ever wanted anything in your life" dance. So I log on expecting to do this dance. Its 2pm and I'm like "ok I have 5-6 hours...one hour to do the dance... leaving 4 hours for sex if necessary" I figure since its thyri and Vyl's first time having sex.. it might take a while. So I log on. And wait. And then he tells me to go out shopping while he shows me around the sim his wife has been building. Ohhh...kay.... So then finally.... at 6pm.. he gets me to do the dance. By the time all the prepwork and dancing is done.... its 8pm and his wife goes to bed. We start the normal fumbling fondlings of first time e-sex... and then I get the IM "I'm so sorry but I'm falling asleep here"

DO WHAT?!?! You're falling ASLEEP? Ok I do realize its 4am where you are but couldnt you have at least budgeted your time SLIGHTLY better if you wanted to do this? Like the 4 fucking hours you spent sitting dead on the sim your wife's building and I'm staring off into space bored out of my skull? Ok... must live up to reputation I've cultivated. Fade to black.... I have to tell him its OK and its RP and I'm not upset at this. But I'm fucking PISSED. You bother to have me write up this long dance that took me over a week to write, thyri's storyline is about to change forever and she might actually become a warm slave if the words were used to break her of this potgirl funk she's in. But no, it's faded to black. He promises he'll "make it up to me" Great, now this dude feels like he owes me. Just fucking peachy. So now I have to figure out how words that werent written will translate into thyri's catharsis. I dont think I can do it. I dont think I can pretend that sex happened when NOTHING happened. Nothing to base it off of. He's still apologizing to me to this day. And I have to say "oh no dont worry about it I'm fine with fading it out"

Am I a fucking leper????? That the only people that want to fuck me want to one line me while RPing with other people, leaving me to be their dirty little secret or... oh wait, there IS no or. Now if I want any kind of e-sex to spank off to or get aroused by... I have to get on an alt and fiddle around until I find someone who can come close to matching me in RP and e-bang them. Because of my reputation saying that a slave has the RIGHT to fade a scene to black if its absolutely abhorrent... now this means that I want nothing to do with sex and that I'm just a complete fucking loser.

This just makes me wonder more and more about thyri's future on Gor. I could reactivate Quixie to see if she can get with a decent RPer and be able to be sexual. Or I could beg this guy to plan his time better so we can get our pixels doing the mambo. Not happy, definitely NOT happy.

So I read Blue's blog tonight. Seems he's STILL hungup about Torrid. And apparantly locked himself off of the Gorums and is throwing a blog Pity Party for himself because noone noticed he was gone. Well lets see here. When you're an abrasive douchebag to anyone you ever meet... ummm no noone's going to care where you've run off to. Because sim after sim isnt begging him to please oh pretty please join us, he feels slighted. Oh boo fucking hoo. You made your bed, asshole. Lay in the sewage that you've sewn. And poor Beth still is all lovey lovey about this JERK. Apparantly he's lied to people in order to enact revenge on other people. Oh LOVELY. Real nice person you are there you JERK. Oh well, back to my own pity party.

I need to get thyri laid. Hell "I" need to get laid. Sex RP is fun, and its something I rather like doing. Just not all the time. But I want it. I want it bad.

Under New Ownership

Well I finally did it. Vyl now owns thyri. This was a rather interesting development but essentially thyri was abandoned. Vyl took thyri to another city that he had moved to from Telnus and informed jared he wanted to buy her. Jared didnt even give me the satisfaction of the RP drama of her being sold in front of her owner. No, it was a "ok this got NPC'ed out" or in the words of the gorumites, FTB'ed. A sale of a slave, faded.... I feel a little odd about that. But RP is RP and I suppose its for the greater good of the RP.

He had another slave, and I just found out today that she was the alt of someone I really respected. I HATE knowing who peoples' alts are. Obviously they're an alt for a reason. Either they want to experience a part of RP they get none of in their existing character or they're trying to deceive people. Well I feel deceived by this person because I rather enjoyed RP with her. Just a real shame.

He took another slave a day after he brought thyri over. I was really in limbo then. He was playing thyri's role like she was the last on a chain, a kettle girl. I so dont want to be stuck in the kettle slave role. But also I think that stems from thyri as well. She was a prized slave and now all of a sudden she's a kettle slave? I think thyri would be sad by this as well. But thyri works because she's so afraid of dying or getting beaten. Still doesnt get her in bed with a man though. I think if thyri was in fact on Gor, she'd have died of hysteria because she has never had sex in SL Gor. Never had "slave rape". I know its an odd concept, but I'm trying my hardest not to be that overhyper slave bounding over to the next man who walks through the door and beg them to fuck her. Me, I beg to clean their house, what is WRONG with me!?!?

So back to this new ownership thing. Its interesting to say the least. It scares the bajeezus out of me. He's married. Yay, fun, another nice guy who's married. SO no chance at personal emotions again. Yes I'm married too, but I'd really enjoy I suppose a chance at feeling like there could be a chance for me. Just reinforces my own unattractiveness I suppose. So thyri's been running around doing essentially everything for this dude and his RP sister, RL wife. I have REALLY been pulling back on anything romantic because he's always with her. I feel very strange cuddling up to a man when his RL wife is standing right there with him. I enjoy RPing with her too and she's a blast of a woman... but still.. I cant hussy up to that. She's given me the go ahead, but I cant break out of the feeling that I sure wouldnt want a girl rubbing all over my husband's legs.

So I made him a picnic, and tried to possibly get in his e-pants. Nope didnt work, he only seemed interested in cuddling. Ok cuddling is good too. But I think thyri's going to have to be very direct and blunt in order for this dude to ever see her as something sexually viable. So basically we had the picnic, cuddled, and then went home. Not so exciting, but at least it was time. I also tried to incorporate his wife into the RP because i dont ever want her to feel like I'm trying to get between her and her husband.

I'm just so... confused. I've fought wanting sex for so long with thyri, that she wants some attention so much, but maybe she's the kind of girl you want to take home to mom, and not the girl you want to fuck