Today was just any other day on Gor for thyri, another day of cooking, cleaning, errands, rinse and repeat. Vyl has been incredibly generous to me, beyond any imagination I may have had of a man's generosity towards a slave. Thyri's still dying inside however. Why? Because she's essentially a lady's slave. Vyl and his sister dress thyri up like a doll, she does housework, she runs errands. She tries to be the perfect slave. And if she never had to see the world around her, she would probably be content.
Today however, she saw a free woman submitting to contractual slavery for a 24 hour period so that she could learn what sex was. And she shattered. I realized this was long coming for thyri, she was so repressed in her new life. Everyone thyri's ever been collared to dotes over her like she's a doll. But they never make her feel her slavery. She's never put to the whip, she's never made to fear displeasing a man.
She fears women, because they're always screaming "disgusting" to her. Always wanting to put her in non revealing clothing, she might as well be wearing robes.
So back to the shattering. The free woman was up, naked, begging to be used by men. She was put through her slave paces. When was the last time thyri was put through slave paces? In the course of RP time, it had been decades, perhaps centuries. When was the last time she was used as a slave? To be made to feel helpless like a slave. To scream as a slave does helpless to stop, helpless to conceal her emotions. Thyri has essentially become, numb to everything. Free womens kicks to the ribs stopped hurting. Cruel words tossed her way... nothing. She serves in work only, sure it may be pleasing but is that it?
So thyri for the first time in a while, shrank back from vyl when he touched her. In front of his "sister" of course since its his RL wife, he couldnt do anything more. Thyri is becoming used to this, but feeling nothing because of it because it always stops. Like a trick, or a game with her. Its killing thyri inside to not be seen as a sexual being when everyone else seems to be seen as such. Despite thyri's efforts to seem sexual, vibrant, alive... its ignored. So she reverts back to work which is where she assumes everyone wants her. But in doing work, she shields herself from sex.
I pray that Vyl takes thyri in hand in the next week, because she's in a bad shape at the moment
Sunday, August 2, 2009
Monday, July 27, 2009
Fade to Black
Oh yes one of my favourite topics. On the Gorums I speak quite a great deal about fading the sex scenes from Gor to black. I just dont see the need for EVERY time your character bumps pixels you need to have a 10 hour fuckfest. At the 2 hour mark really, you're not in RP anymore, you're cybering. I've apparantly gotten the scarlet letter on my chest from posting my aversion to this because I've had no less than 3 men tell me that "someone" told them that I wouldnt RP sex with them. Ummmm thats NOT what I said. Or maybe not what I meant. Gor isnt ALWAYS about the sex. But the sex is good as a part of things, just not the only part. We're seeing more "paga sluts" and "coin girls" on Gor these days. Why is that? Oh yah because I forgot that Gor was the SLwide forum to show off your cybering skills you pathetic creature. I'm sorry, some of these girls are my friend, but I know a LOT of girls who use cybersex as some kind of validation for themselves. Ummm NO. I'm NOT going to take my self esteem from how well I can get some dude off with my words. I KNOW I can get a dude off because of my words.
So on that note Vyl and I have been dancing around the sex issue for the past month or so. One month, RP every day and no sex. Ok apparantly I have to work at this and seduce him. Ok I get it, you like women to persue you actively. Ok fine. So finally after being his pot girl for a few weeks, he tells me I have to write a dance. So I do. I write a need dance. And its fucking HOT because well.. I wrote it. Its not masturbating in the grass hot its just "you WILL fuck me now because you're going to want this more than you've ever wanted anything in your life" dance. So I log on expecting to do this dance. Its 2pm and I'm like "ok I have 5-6 hours...one hour to do the dance... leaving 4 hours for sex if necessary" I figure since its thyri and Vyl's first time having sex.. it might take a while. So I log on. And wait. And then he tells me to go out shopping while he shows me around the sim his wife has been building. Ohhh...kay.... So then finally.... at 6pm.. he gets me to do the dance. By the time all the prepwork and dancing is done.... its 8pm and his wife goes to bed. We start the normal fumbling fondlings of first time e-sex... and then I get the IM "I'm so sorry but I'm falling asleep here"
DO WHAT?!?! You're falling ASLEEP? Ok I do realize its 4am where you are but couldnt you have at least budgeted your time SLIGHTLY better if you wanted to do this? Like the 4 fucking hours you spent sitting dead on the sim your wife's building and I'm staring off into space bored out of my skull? Ok... must live up to reputation I've cultivated. Fade to black.... I have to tell him its OK and its RP and I'm not upset at this. But I'm fucking PISSED. You bother to have me write up this long dance that took me over a week to write, thyri's storyline is about to change forever and she might actually become a warm slave if the words were used to break her of this potgirl funk she's in. But no, it's faded to black. He promises he'll "make it up to me" Great, now this dude feels like he owes me. Just fucking peachy. So now I have to figure out how words that werent written will translate into thyri's catharsis. I dont think I can do it. I dont think I can pretend that sex happened when NOTHING happened. Nothing to base it off of. He's still apologizing to me to this day. And I have to say "oh no dont worry about it I'm fine with fading it out"
Am I a fucking leper????? That the only people that want to fuck me want to one line me while RPing with other people, leaving me to be their dirty little secret or... oh wait, there IS no or. Now if I want any kind of e-sex to spank off to or get aroused by... I have to get on an alt and fiddle around until I find someone who can come close to matching me in RP and e-bang them. Because of my reputation saying that a slave has the RIGHT to fade a scene to black if its absolutely abhorrent... now this means that I want nothing to do with sex and that I'm just a complete fucking loser.
This just makes me wonder more and more about thyri's future on Gor. I could reactivate Quixie to see if she can get with a decent RPer and be able to be sexual. Or I could beg this guy to plan his time better so we can get our pixels doing the mambo. Not happy, definitely NOT happy.
So I read Blue's blog tonight. Seems he's STILL hungup about Torrid. And apparantly locked himself off of the Gorums and is throwing a blog Pity Party for himself because noone noticed he was gone. Well lets see here. When you're an abrasive douchebag to anyone you ever meet... ummm no noone's going to care where you've run off to. Because sim after sim isnt begging him to please oh pretty please join us, he feels slighted. Oh boo fucking hoo. You made your bed, asshole. Lay in the sewage that you've sewn. And poor Beth still is all lovey lovey about this JERK. Apparantly he's lied to people in order to enact revenge on other people. Oh LOVELY. Real nice person you are there you JERK. Oh well, back to my own pity party.
I need to get thyri laid. Hell "I" need to get laid. Sex RP is fun, and its something I rather like doing. Just not all the time. But I want it. I want it bad.
So on that note Vyl and I have been dancing around the sex issue for the past month or so. One month, RP every day and no sex. Ok apparantly I have to work at this and seduce him. Ok I get it, you like women to persue you actively. Ok fine. So finally after being his pot girl for a few weeks, he tells me I have to write a dance. So I do. I write a need dance. And its fucking HOT because well.. I wrote it. Its not masturbating in the grass hot its just "you WILL fuck me now because you're going to want this more than you've ever wanted anything in your life" dance. So I log on expecting to do this dance. Its 2pm and I'm like "ok I have 5-6 hours...one hour to do the dance... leaving 4 hours for sex if necessary" I figure since its thyri and Vyl's first time having sex.. it might take a while. So I log on. And wait. And then he tells me to go out shopping while he shows me around the sim his wife has been building. Ohhh...kay.... So then finally.... at 6pm.. he gets me to do the dance. By the time all the prepwork and dancing is done.... its 8pm and his wife goes to bed. We start the normal fumbling fondlings of first time e-sex... and then I get the IM "I'm so sorry but I'm falling asleep here"
DO WHAT?!?! You're falling ASLEEP? Ok I do realize its 4am where you are but couldnt you have at least budgeted your time SLIGHTLY better if you wanted to do this? Like the 4 fucking hours you spent sitting dead on the sim your wife's building and I'm staring off into space bored out of my skull? Ok... must live up to reputation I've cultivated. Fade to black.... I have to tell him its OK and its RP and I'm not upset at this. But I'm fucking PISSED. You bother to have me write up this long dance that took me over a week to write, thyri's storyline is about to change forever and she might actually become a warm slave if the words were used to break her of this potgirl funk she's in. But no, it's faded to black. He promises he'll "make it up to me" Great, now this dude feels like he owes me. Just fucking peachy. So now I have to figure out how words that werent written will translate into thyri's catharsis. I dont think I can do it. I dont think I can pretend that sex happened when NOTHING happened. Nothing to base it off of. He's still apologizing to me to this day. And I have to say "oh no dont worry about it I'm fine with fading it out"
Am I a fucking leper????? That the only people that want to fuck me want to one line me while RPing with other people, leaving me to be their dirty little secret or... oh wait, there IS no or. Now if I want any kind of e-sex to spank off to or get aroused by... I have to get on an alt and fiddle around until I find someone who can come close to matching me in RP and e-bang them. Because of my reputation saying that a slave has the RIGHT to fade a scene to black if its absolutely abhorrent... now this means that I want nothing to do with sex and that I'm just a complete fucking loser.
This just makes me wonder more and more about thyri's future on Gor. I could reactivate Quixie to see if she can get with a decent RPer and be able to be sexual. Or I could beg this guy to plan his time better so we can get our pixels doing the mambo. Not happy, definitely NOT happy.
So I read Blue's blog tonight. Seems he's STILL hungup about Torrid. And apparantly locked himself off of the Gorums and is throwing a blog Pity Party for himself because noone noticed he was gone. Well lets see here. When you're an abrasive douchebag to anyone you ever meet... ummm no noone's going to care where you've run off to. Because sim after sim isnt begging him to please oh pretty please join us, he feels slighted. Oh boo fucking hoo. You made your bed, asshole. Lay in the sewage that you've sewn. And poor Beth still is all lovey lovey about this JERK. Apparantly he's lied to people in order to enact revenge on other people. Oh LOVELY. Real nice person you are there you JERK. Oh well, back to my own pity party.
I need to get thyri laid. Hell "I" need to get laid. Sex RP is fun, and its something I rather like doing. Just not all the time. But I want it. I want it bad.
Sunday, July 12, 2009
Under New Ownership
Well I finally did it. Vyl now owns thyri. This was a rather interesting development but essentially thyri was abandoned. Vyl took thyri to another city that he had moved to from Telnus and informed jared he wanted to buy her. Jared didnt even give me the satisfaction of the RP drama of her being sold in front of her owner. No, it was a "ok this got NPC'ed out" or in the words of the gorumites, FTB'ed. A sale of a slave, faded.... I feel a little odd about that. But RP is RP and I suppose its for the greater good of the RP.
He had another slave, and I just found out today that she was the alt of someone I really respected. I HATE knowing who peoples' alts are. Obviously they're an alt for a reason. Either they want to experience a part of RP they get none of in their existing character or they're trying to deceive people. Well I feel deceived by this person because I rather enjoyed RP with her. Just a real shame.
He took another slave a day after he brought thyri over. I was really in limbo then. He was playing thyri's role like she was the last on a chain, a kettle girl. I so dont want to be stuck in the kettle slave role. But also I think that stems from thyri as well. She was a prized slave and now all of a sudden she's a kettle slave? I think thyri would be sad by this as well. But thyri works because she's so afraid of dying or getting beaten. Still doesnt get her in bed with a man though. I think if thyri was in fact on Gor, she'd have died of hysteria because she has never had sex in SL Gor. Never had "slave rape". I know its an odd concept, but I'm trying my hardest not to be that overhyper slave bounding over to the next man who walks through the door and beg them to fuck her. Me, I beg to clean their house, what is WRONG with me!?!?
So back to this new ownership thing. Its interesting to say the least. It scares the bajeezus out of me. He's married. Yay, fun, another nice guy who's married. SO no chance at personal emotions again. Yes I'm married too, but I'd really enjoy I suppose a chance at feeling like there could be a chance for me. Just reinforces my own unattractiveness I suppose. So thyri's been running around doing essentially everything for this dude and his RP sister, RL wife. I have REALLY been pulling back on anything romantic because he's always with her. I feel very strange cuddling up to a man when his RL wife is standing right there with him. I enjoy RPing with her too and she's a blast of a woman... but still.. I cant hussy up to that. She's given me the go ahead, but I cant break out of the feeling that I sure wouldnt want a girl rubbing all over my husband's legs.
So I made him a picnic, and tried to possibly get in his e-pants. Nope didnt work, he only seemed interested in cuddling. Ok cuddling is good too. But I think thyri's going to have to be very direct and blunt in order for this dude to ever see her as something sexually viable. So basically we had the picnic, cuddled, and then went home. Not so exciting, but at least it was time. I also tried to incorporate his wife into the RP because i dont ever want her to feel like I'm trying to get between her and her husband.
I'm just so... confused. I've fought wanting sex for so long with thyri, that she wants some attention so much, but maybe she's the kind of girl you want to take home to mom, and not the girl you want to fuck
He had another slave, and I just found out today that she was the alt of someone I really respected. I HATE knowing who peoples' alts are. Obviously they're an alt for a reason. Either they want to experience a part of RP they get none of in their existing character or they're trying to deceive people. Well I feel deceived by this person because I rather enjoyed RP with her. Just a real shame.
He took another slave a day after he brought thyri over. I was really in limbo then. He was playing thyri's role like she was the last on a chain, a kettle girl. I so dont want to be stuck in the kettle slave role. But also I think that stems from thyri as well. She was a prized slave and now all of a sudden she's a kettle slave? I think thyri would be sad by this as well. But thyri works because she's so afraid of dying or getting beaten. Still doesnt get her in bed with a man though. I think if thyri was in fact on Gor, she'd have died of hysteria because she has never had sex in SL Gor. Never had "slave rape". I know its an odd concept, but I'm trying my hardest not to be that overhyper slave bounding over to the next man who walks through the door and beg them to fuck her. Me, I beg to clean their house, what is WRONG with me!?!?
So back to this new ownership thing. Its interesting to say the least. It scares the bajeezus out of me. He's married. Yay, fun, another nice guy who's married. SO no chance at personal emotions again. Yes I'm married too, but I'd really enjoy I suppose a chance at feeling like there could be a chance for me. Just reinforces my own unattractiveness I suppose. So thyri's been running around doing essentially everything for this dude and his RP sister, RL wife. I have REALLY been pulling back on anything romantic because he's always with her. I feel very strange cuddling up to a man when his RL wife is standing right there with him. I enjoy RPing with her too and she's a blast of a woman... but still.. I cant hussy up to that. She's given me the go ahead, but I cant break out of the feeling that I sure wouldnt want a girl rubbing all over my husband's legs.
So I made him a picnic, and tried to possibly get in his e-pants. Nope didnt work, he only seemed interested in cuddling. Ok cuddling is good too. But I think thyri's going to have to be very direct and blunt in order for this dude to ever see her as something sexually viable. So basically we had the picnic, cuddled, and then went home. Not so exciting, but at least it was time. I also tried to incorporate his wife into the RP because i dont ever want her to feel like I'm trying to get between her and her husband.
I'm just so... confused. I've fought wanting sex for so long with thyri, that she wants some attention so much, but maybe she's the kind of girl you want to take home to mom, and not the girl you want to fuck
Monday, June 29, 2009
Not dead yet
Well Its been a while since I blogged because there really hasnt been much of interest going on. Life in Cos had pretty much gone from bad to worse. There was no RP at any time anywhere other than your requisite greetings and blank vacant stares. In an effort to "spice up" the RP, the powers that be decided to wreck the existing city and rebuild it. We were all a twitter about the fun that could come from this. But what happened.,... the RP died. The people left. Or they just didnt show up. Many moved on to the RP du jour of the sim Obscure Reality which had nothing to do with Gor. I even ventured there a few times and found it to be seriously wanting. Midian folk and gorean folk all staying in their respective social groups. Not very RP condusive if you ask me, it was just taking a certain RP and moving it elsewhere. Meh, its the flavor of the month.
Jared made more promises to be around more and to master thyri more, but that promise was again broken. thyri finally will be sold. Vyl rented thyri for a few weeks which was some decent RP actually. I get to do my solo RP thing and actually have it appreciated. And I have some decent RP. Now I had never thought of really being his. He strikes me as a little unstable, he's Dutch, and it really seems to me the dutch seem to act very very quickly for things. Not really my style, but its ownership and its RP. I do have a bit of a problem with the sexual aspect with him. As much as i've gone on and on about my aversion to sexual RP on the Gorums, I do actually like sexual RP. I love it. I just dont want my only Gorean role to be just sexual. But I think he misunderstands me thinking that all I want to RP is a work slave. I hope this is not the case.
My poor friend is still under the spell of this completely abusive dude and I really feel sorry for her. She claims to love him. He's young enough to be her son, he's mentally unstable and requires a gaggle of women constantly around him to validate his existance. I only hope her eyes will open up soon before she gets seriously hurt by him. He's already cajoled her past many of her limits and I just pray that she sees the truth about this guy before he does her some serious harm
Jared made more promises to be around more and to master thyri more, but that promise was again broken. thyri finally will be sold. Vyl rented thyri for a few weeks which was some decent RP actually. I get to do my solo RP thing and actually have it appreciated. And I have some decent RP. Now I had never thought of really being his. He strikes me as a little unstable, he's Dutch, and it really seems to me the dutch seem to act very very quickly for things. Not really my style, but its ownership and its RP. I do have a bit of a problem with the sexual aspect with him. As much as i've gone on and on about my aversion to sexual RP on the Gorums, I do actually like sexual RP. I love it. I just dont want my only Gorean role to be just sexual. But I think he misunderstands me thinking that all I want to RP is a work slave. I hope this is not the case.
My poor friend is still under the spell of this completely abusive dude and I really feel sorry for her. She claims to love him. He's young enough to be her son, he's mentally unstable and requires a gaggle of women constantly around him to validate his existance. I only hope her eyes will open up soon before she gets seriously hurt by him. He's already cajoled her past many of her limits and I just pray that she sees the truth about this guy before he does her some serious harm
Sunday, June 7, 2009
Doors close, doors open
For the longest time I discounted Vyl as a potential new owner. Probably the number one reason is because I'm scared to death that I'm going to get close to him and get hurt. He's dutch, he's very happily married, I'm american, I'm very unhappily married. NOT a good situation for me personally. We have shared a great deal of our personal lives with each other, we share a similar spirituality, he asks about my foot even when my master has stopped. He seems concerned about me which is nice. I cant help but think most everything is a setup these days. Some prank to have me fall flat on my face, something to restrict my freedoms, something to break me. I'm not ready to break yet. I'm already so broken because of my husband, breaking to another man will probably cause me some kind of mental illness.
But he's nice. And he does RP with me. He doesnt just send me away, we have similar gorean views, and he is a para Rper despite the language barrier. I cant help but imagine what he must go through to speak my language in such volume. Maybe I'm one of those ugly americans but I couldnt RP in dutch to save my life.
Its scaring me, its scaring me a lot. I look forward to seeing this person online so much that I hide from them. I dont want it to appear as though I'm chasing them or trying to use their influence to my benefit. I dont want to be the slave of someone in power because I dont want to look like I'm some power hungry kissup.
So thyri's role has changed a great deal. Once a dancer, a tavern slut who was the most desired in HTML Gor.... is now... a pot girl. She cleans, she cooks, she gets up before everyone else does to make the tea and black wine. She sleeps in the work shed, she is the definition to me of a slave. And it hurts. Because of the state of slaves in SL Gor, every one of them clamoring for sexual attention, I cannot cry out for it. Lords knows I do want to, it would be nice to get more than one line. But to ask for sex would be to compete with everyone else out there for the notch that day on the bedpost. And I'm not that girl
The other day, Vyl and I were probably the most intimate with each other than we ever had. Perhaps I felt liberated because his character could do nothing about any advances I made, but the second anything turned sexual, I ran. Why am I still running? I dont know, I wish I did. Maybe its because I'm so scared I've put so much into thyri that I may shatter if anything goes wrong. I have no problems RPing sexually on an alt though so I know its not some fear of getting my word jollies off.
Confusion still ensues for me.
But he's nice. And he does RP with me. He doesnt just send me away, we have similar gorean views, and he is a para Rper despite the language barrier. I cant help but imagine what he must go through to speak my language in such volume. Maybe I'm one of those ugly americans but I couldnt RP in dutch to save my life.
Its scaring me, its scaring me a lot. I look forward to seeing this person online so much that I hide from them. I dont want it to appear as though I'm chasing them or trying to use their influence to my benefit. I dont want to be the slave of someone in power because I dont want to look like I'm some power hungry kissup.
So thyri's role has changed a great deal. Once a dancer, a tavern slut who was the most desired in HTML Gor.... is now... a pot girl. She cleans, she cooks, she gets up before everyone else does to make the tea and black wine. She sleeps in the work shed, she is the definition to me of a slave. And it hurts. Because of the state of slaves in SL Gor, every one of them clamoring for sexual attention, I cannot cry out for it. Lords knows I do want to, it would be nice to get more than one line. But to ask for sex would be to compete with everyone else out there for the notch that day on the bedpost. And I'm not that girl
The other day, Vyl and I were probably the most intimate with each other than we ever had. Perhaps I felt liberated because his character could do nothing about any advances I made, but the second anything turned sexual, I ran. Why am I still running? I dont know, I wish I did. Maybe its because I'm so scared I've put so much into thyri that I may shatter if anything goes wrong. I have no problems RPing sexually on an alt though so I know its not some fear of getting my word jollies off.
Confusion still ensues for me.
What is Gor?
Well to continue my plight, I regressed again into WoW because probably of Blue again. The man absolutely infuriates me. There are apparantly some people in this world who dont know when to speak and when they just need to keep their opinions to themselves. Sometimes they need to learn some couth when asked for their opinion to simply smile and nod. This is a lost art form. Its not lying, its simple courtesy. We got into it when he said I expect people to come to me to RP with me, and that I'm behaving like a princess because I expect people to come to me. If I expected people to come to me, why would I spend so many hours in solo RP? ACTIVE solo RP. Not just standing away from people within earshot of their conversations, but actually doing something.
Then he said some things that just really pissed me off. On the gorums we debate a lot. I believe that Gor is not all about sex and fucking and where to have sex, and how to have sex, and when to have sex... sex sex sex. NO, its NOT all about sex. Sex is a part of life, a natural part of a Gorean's life. But its not the ONLY part. Now granted, when we log into Gor we are taking a slice of the life of our character and portraying that slice. But, does that slice have to be sex all the time? Sex or fighting or sex, or... fighting... or sex? Seems rather redundant and I can get sex in some freebie sex club and I dont need to RP Gor to get my pixel porno fix.
But Blue decided to attack me on the forums. AGAIN. When he confronted me in world about it, he told me that he actually was trying to RP with me IC. I never saw it, I saw his Dace character RP with me, but Tristan and Blue, and gods knows who else... nope. They never did. So I dont know what he was talking about then. THen he brought up our little trysts, and how I was so open. I said yah, so open giving him the best of my RP while he was in RP on another character and probably on MSN or Yahoo RPing with someone else, and giving me one line responses to my text. I told him that legend had it that he was some kind of stellar RPer. I didnt see it. He asked if he would have another chance. I said probably not because it wasnt the first time it happened and if he's so popular as to have RP surrounding him in multiple forms... he doesnt need me to RP with. After yet another arguement on the gorums, I was forced to mute him. In world, on MSN, on the forums. I have had it.
He got on an alt to try to insult me again, so I had to mute that alt as well. Its absolutely amazing that he calls what we had "friendship". If my being his whipping girl and standing up for him despite everything he went through with Torrid and Dear and gods knows who else. Well I suppose I served my purpose. But I can only be someone's punching bag for so long.
Then he said some things that just really pissed me off. On the gorums we debate a lot. I believe that Gor is not all about sex and fucking and where to have sex, and how to have sex, and when to have sex... sex sex sex. NO, its NOT all about sex. Sex is a part of life, a natural part of a Gorean's life. But its not the ONLY part. Now granted, when we log into Gor we are taking a slice of the life of our character and portraying that slice. But, does that slice have to be sex all the time? Sex or fighting or sex, or... fighting... or sex? Seems rather redundant and I can get sex in some freebie sex club and I dont need to RP Gor to get my pixel porno fix.
But Blue decided to attack me on the forums. AGAIN. When he confronted me in world about it, he told me that he actually was trying to RP with me IC. I never saw it, I saw his Dace character RP with me, but Tristan and Blue, and gods knows who else... nope. They never did. So I dont know what he was talking about then. THen he brought up our little trysts, and how I was so open. I said yah, so open giving him the best of my RP while he was in RP on another character and probably on MSN or Yahoo RPing with someone else, and giving me one line responses to my text. I told him that legend had it that he was some kind of stellar RPer. I didnt see it. He asked if he would have another chance. I said probably not because it wasnt the first time it happened and if he's so popular as to have RP surrounding him in multiple forms... he doesnt need me to RP with. After yet another arguement on the gorums, I was forced to mute him. In world, on MSN, on the forums. I have had it.
He got on an alt to try to insult me again, so I had to mute that alt as well. Its absolutely amazing that he calls what we had "friendship". If my being his whipping girl and standing up for him despite everything he went through with Torrid and Dear and gods knows who else. Well I suppose I served my purpose. But I can only be someone's punching bag for so long.
Been a while
So, I stopped blogging for a while. Things have been turbulent at best.
My master is never around anymore. Well, in second life he's never around. In WoW, he's always there. Now I understand that he pays money for WoW and that during these times, money is tight. But no role play in a month to only get about an hour or so is not all that great. Frankly, it sucks.
So I put my feelers out for a new owner. Blue is certainly NOT an option. Not because he gets in my head, well thats one, but he also has this arguementative personality that just grates on me. Frankly he reminds me of my husband. EEEW! Arguing just for the sake of arguing without even trying to see the other person's point of view. Ever notice how someone you're thinking of dating treats the waiter? Well thats like Blue. Has his charming points, but in RP... my experience with him, he cant hold a candle to me and thats because of being rude.
Then there's Vyl. Vyl's nice. He's been trying to get his hands on me since I showed up in Telnus. Problem is, time zones. And language barrier. And... he's dutch. And I think he's very flitty. He thinks he has his perfect match and latches on very quick only to find out things werent all that they seemed. Things continue with Vyl to this day however.
Then there's Scott. Good ol reliable Scott. He's a sweetiepie. The kind you just want to wrap up with a bow and take home to mom. He's a very very dear friend to me and I do care for him like I care fiercely for those I do call friend. He watches out for me and we talk about our personal lives and stuff. Problem is, he's one man trying to save the world. And the world needs a lot of saving. I call his chain of kajirae the "Gaffer Home for Wayward Kajirae" he's got a LONG chain. And he's one person. I couldnt deal with it. Great friend... not so great as an owner.
Then I went out on a limb. I have been talking to someone who's a gaming geek like me, wants to change the world etc... decent fellow, adequate RPer from what I've seen. And all seemed well and good en route to a possible purchase by him. And then he leaves Gor. GAH! Why oh why... oh well. I infatuate easily.
There is also the fighter Karim I absolutely lust after. Its totally just his fighting style I admire. The warrior spirit. I have no clue how he treats people, how he RPs but he's pretty to look at!
to be continued, this is getting long.
My master is never around anymore. Well, in second life he's never around. In WoW, he's always there. Now I understand that he pays money for WoW and that during these times, money is tight. But no role play in a month to only get about an hour or so is not all that great. Frankly, it sucks.
So I put my feelers out for a new owner. Blue is certainly NOT an option. Not because he gets in my head, well thats one, but he also has this arguementative personality that just grates on me. Frankly he reminds me of my husband. EEEW! Arguing just for the sake of arguing without even trying to see the other person's point of view. Ever notice how someone you're thinking of dating treats the waiter? Well thats like Blue. Has his charming points, but in RP... my experience with him, he cant hold a candle to me and thats because of being rude.
Then there's Vyl. Vyl's nice. He's been trying to get his hands on me since I showed up in Telnus. Problem is, time zones. And language barrier. And... he's dutch. And I think he's very flitty. He thinks he has his perfect match and latches on very quick only to find out things werent all that they seemed. Things continue with Vyl to this day however.
Then there's Scott. Good ol reliable Scott. He's a sweetiepie. The kind you just want to wrap up with a bow and take home to mom. He's a very very dear friend to me and I do care for him like I care fiercely for those I do call friend. He watches out for me and we talk about our personal lives and stuff. Problem is, he's one man trying to save the world. And the world needs a lot of saving. I call his chain of kajirae the "Gaffer Home for Wayward Kajirae" he's got a LONG chain. And he's one person. I couldnt deal with it. Great friend... not so great as an owner.
Then I went out on a limb. I have been talking to someone who's a gaming geek like me, wants to change the world etc... decent fellow, adequate RPer from what I've seen. And all seemed well and good en route to a possible purchase by him. And then he leaves Gor. GAH! Why oh why... oh well. I infatuate easily.
There is also the fighter Karim I absolutely lust after. Its totally just his fighting style I admire. The warrior spirit. I have no clue how he treats people, how he RPs but he's pretty to look at!
to be continued, this is getting long.
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